I’ve now had over three months of virtual gamelessness. I mean, sure, I never thought I’d be sick this long, and I surely never thought I wouldn’t have gamed pretty much at all in that span. Yet here I am, with perhaps a half a dozen hours of gaming under my belt since January.
I’m not going to lie: it’s depressing.
It depressing enough to be a perpetual couch barnacle but, today, I realized I hadn’t been outside in four days. The sun was so bright (even through my sunglasses), I felt like one of those weird blind creatures that lives underground and navigates by sound alone. I forgot how fresh air on my face feels.
It was strange.
Even if I had known I would be sick, I would have assumed I’d at least be able to play games during that time.
Not so.
After my failed experiment the other day with an hour of Borderlands, I realized how very unnerved I was that I really can’t play right now. The bulk of the games I play are FPS games. Without those, my gaming landscape would be a vastly different space. I love games of all types, but I do find myself in the shooter genre more often than not.
It may sound paranoid, but I started to worry about what would happen if I could just never play games again. I know that’s entirely unlikely, but I was concerned about it none the less. How would my life be different?
I love games dearly, and without those experiences, I’d be a little heartbroken. Games are a way to explore and experience and connect. Without that as a possibility, I would be amiss.
To be fair, there are plenty of slower more text-based games I could be trying my hand at, I just haven’t. Honestly, it’s been for fear of not being able to play those, either. I have no shortage of games I could at least try, but I am nervous. I want to get back to this area of my life that I love, especially if I can barely go outside once or twice a week.
I want to have experiences again.
One of the things I’ve been wanting to do more and more is paint again. My medium of choice is acrylic on canvas (I like canvases that are at least 36×48), and I currently have all these color combinations rolling around in my head. I’m a huge fan of abstract art, and I’m hoping to put some of those thoughts to canvas in the coming months. I want to see those colors in front of me on the walls and not just in my mind.
I’d also like to be singing and playing the piano more again. My background (and passion) is in musical theatre, and it feels more and more like I need to be giving further attention to that. I’ve suppressed it for far too long.
So this got me thinking, what would all of us be doing if we weren’t playing games? I mean, if games weren’t an option, what would you be doing? What would be your ideal replacement activities? How would you feel if you wanted desperately to play, but couldn’t? Would you keep trying even if it made you feel miserable, physically?
Also, what will you be playing this weekend? I’m living through all of you right now, so please spare no detail. Your gaming is my brain food.
Categories: games
Rebekah Lang 
I absolutely empathize with this. While I’m not in exactly the same boat as you, we share a similar sea. Being a full-time college student with two jobs and a metric ass load of homework has allowed me to play zero games for the past couple months and it’s driving me absolutely… well, more insane.
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Well said! I can’t even imagine trying to game while going to school and working two jobs. I admire that greatly.
I hope we are both able to play far sooner than later.
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No gaming this weekend. Heading to D.C. I’ll commence gaming on Monday; I’m still playing Andromeda.
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I hope your trip to DC was enjoyable and that you get to dive back in to games today!
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It was great. The food is excellent. The history of the city is crazy. The memorials/monuments are amazing. I did get back into Andromeda. Still hitting the side/loyalty missions. Plan to get into Meridian tomorrow.
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I’m glad you had a good time!
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I’m so sorry to hear that you’re not only still sick but still struggling to play games whatsoever. I’m sending you best wishes this weekend that you feel better and can spend some time gaming. My game time has been sorely curtailed by work. When I do play it’s been short Overwatch sessions and I’ve been so stressed that I play horribly and ranking is in the toilet. I’m hoping this weekend to polish off the workload so that I can have fun again. Fingers crossed!
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Ugh, thank you. I feel bad even talking about it because I am such a major downer. BLECH.
I’m sorry you are still buried by work! That’s no good. I mean, I’m glad you are getting to play some Overwatch here and there, but I’m sorry it hasn’t be going terribly well.
I wish you a huge amount of fun! :)
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It’s awful to realize it’s been three months now, poor you. Your painting inspiration sounds like a good idea to try, maybe it’ll take your mind off things? Anyway, I’d return to reading as I’ve done most of my life. Love painting too, with a preference for oils. And I’ve always loved writing, maybe even try my hand at writing stories!
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It’s kind of unbelievable, honestly. I never would have expected this.
I would love to paint sooner than later. I just need to round up some canvases and get some paint and then go to town.
I didn’t know you painted! Do you have any images of your work? I’d love to see some! What types of things do you like to paint?
Can you write fiction? If so, I am envious!
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First I’d have to find the things I painted, it’s been so long! I like painting something real, was never any good at abstracts. Somehow my efforts always ended up strongly resembling something. Fiction…I did pen down some chapters years ago, but somehow common sense always prevails. I keep thinking that there are already so many books out there, it’s hard to be original. And who on earth is going to read it, lol.
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Well if you ever find them, I’d love to see. And I think it’s wonderful that you can paint real things! I am awful at that. I am abstract all the way. I get colors in my head and I want to see them on canvas. It also requires no talent! :)
I mean, yes, there are already many books out there, but each person’s voice is different and I think there is plenty of room for your voice among them. I’d read it! I am CERTAIN there are others who would, too. Yes. Yes I am certain of that.
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Again, I’m sorry to hear that you are still sick. I hope you get to feeling better soon.
As for your question, I “wood” build something. (Get it?)
A cat condo, with a living roof and pergola for shade, & camouflage from birds of prey.
Cheers,
Steven
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Thank you. I feel badly even talking about it anymore because I know I am a great big downer. It’s no good.
You should build one for the boys. I’m sure they would love it. Sorry, I’m sure they WOOD love it.
And thank you. I’m ready to feel better like RIGHT NOW.
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